A Final End (Goodbye)

How do we say good bye to someone we love?
How do we make such a decision in the first place?
Life makes it for us
Reason and emotion don’t go hand in hand
But our hands
Fit nicely together
Until life told us otherwise
Goodbye
Is such a cruel sounding word
Like death
It plagues the mind of the living
And the heart that is used to giving love
But goodbye
Sometimes
Is not a final end
But the beginning of a new chapter
And the creation of a fond memory
Which will keep our heart company forever
Goodbye my friend
I love you

I Loved You Too Late

We started in passions embrace
Giving in to the whims of flesh
And because of our obsession with the physical
You called us the killers of true love

I laughed
“Yes, I am the matador of love”

Still rapturous, you were hopeful in that moment.
“I can feel your heart beating against my chest.
It feels as if it is my very own, and for this moment in time, your heart is mine.”

You confessed your love for me then, but I shot it down.
Not with cupid’s arrow, but with an arrow loosed in a playful hunt,
One which struck hard the snow white dove
And caused her blood to flow.

But then the transition…

Your heart grew distant and detached.
Mine grew soft
And sprouted wings of love for you.
But the game had been played too long,
And by the time that I,
The matador,
Confessed my true love, your heart was gone.
You had become invisible, a ghost.
Too little too late, goes the cliché.
What I felt was real, but arrived too slowly.
In the end, I guess,
I loved you, yes.
But I loved you too late.
Too late to matter.
Too late to mend wounds or open doors.
Too late to save either of us.
In the end,
I loved you too late.

Mujer De Dio

The God of all Gods
Sent you on a mission
To this earth, he sent you
And he named you, then
Beautiful
Proud
Elegant
Woman
He called you mother, lover,
He called you wife
And to me
He called you friend
Friend to the drowning heart
Friend to addiction
Friend to the friendless
To the lonely one who still believes in love
To the weak, who wait upon your strength
Yes
Your strength to save him
Because a man needs a woman
To be whole
To be real
To be full
So you have become the timeless one
Female
The energy that completes a man’s desire
The truth that he can not refute
A testimony to God
Yet still a woman who craves love
You
In spite of your father, the God of all the heavens
Are still the “She” creature
The woman (and my friend)
Whom I do crave
With hair, black like the night
And eyes,
Dark with wisdom and mystery
That might one day linger upon my flesh
Wanting

Always Saturday

Give me a small kiss
With the fullness of your lips
Just a little pinch of love
Like a tiny gift
Upon my mouth
So that I might know
The simple treasures of life
Like the daisy and the rolling stream
The bold river and the stars
Let me know that I am loved
And touch my cheek
With your fingertips
So that I may know this love is real
A fleshly thing to feel
And not hallucination
Wiggle you bright toes
And smile and laugh
So that I might see the sun
Show me your pouting lips because you want affection
Change the channel on the TV
Light a candle
Put a flower in a vase
And let me see your face
In the mirror with mine
After a shower
Put the pieces together
The puzzle
Of my broken heart
Lie with me under a tree in a park
Where strangers walk
Talk to me with your Latin mouth
And let me explain the words that we find
In the white mans dictionary
Tell me of your homeland
As we dream of babies
Let me feed you ice cream
Light my cigarette
Cry when you feel troubled
And lay your head upon my chest
Stretch before me denuda (nude/naked)
While I write a poem for you
Feed me shrimp
Because they taste delightful
But all the more so
Because they come from your hand
Curse when the Yankees lose
And laugh when the kittens play
Slap my face because you’re human
Let me know that you are real
Give me your mouth
In simple ways
With a kiss and with a soft
“I love you”
As your head rests on the pillow smiling
When I see the brightness of your eyes
Although the room is dark
And your eyes are shinning
And your mouth is smiling
And the sheets smell fresh
Except for a hint of the flesh
Because we made love on them
Tell me today is Saturday
Siempre (always)
When I awaken
And that there are no more Mondays
Tell me that you want to go to the beach
Or the zoo
And that my love for you
Makes your heart jump
Maybe we can fly a kite
While ugly people sit at desks and make phone calls
We can write a poem together
While the teapot begins to boil
And make love
At 1:34pm on Thursday afternoon
Then take a road trip
That lasts through most of the following week
Then kiss me on the cheek
As I drive down a new highway
Into freedoms open door
And let us explore this world
That we were begrudgingly born
Yet embrace with a suspicious smile
Let me smell you without a bath
On a camping trip
And let me build a fire for you
When the night is cold
Spread your wings in flight
This night
And let us love
Before we are old

My Mirror

You are my mirror
And I weep for the seeing
Looking at you, looking into me
Everything that I am
Everything I could ever be
Hidden in your shinning eyes
Sometimes I see a man smaller than myself
Petty
I see a fool
Sometimes in your eyes,
I am much larger than myself
A king, a God
And I have never known unconditional love
Until I knew you
With a spirit that is pure
Like Holy water
In a sacred pool
And when the ugly part of me speaks
(The small man)
You are silent
Waiting for your champion
And when he laughs, and shines his stupid grin
You are patient
Waiting for your king.
And when he stumbles
You extend a gracious hand
Helping him to stand
So you see
Your mirror shows the truth of me
And I could never lie
When I look into your eyes

Like a cat

You are beautiful
Like a cat
Expressing things with gestures
Things like this or that
Elegantly exaggerating the feminine
But with softness
On top of innocence
Underneath a hint of perfume
You shine
Exploring a world of human needs
With a heart divine
I have never known a cat like you
Or a woman with such Grace
Embracing things eternal
While dancing with the human race
You float across the embers
Blown by the wind
You are like tiny feathers
My smiling, laughing friend
You bring crashing softness
When your night is exposed
By the round moon
The yellow
That pulls the tides
As you ride
Upon a hot blanket
To paradise

Had It Been You

I wonder how my life will be in 50 years
Will I laugh at grandchildren
Rolling around on the floor?
Will I look up to see my wife?
Will I imagine her love over the years?
Or will I wonder what might have been
Had it been you?
All the love and affection that I gave to her
Anniversaries and Christmas parties
Walks in the park
Snowmen and warm mittens
Had it been you?
Laughing together, then crying in unison
As we held our newborn son
Sailing together on salty water
With the wind blowing affectionately
Kissing sunburned skin
Taking road trips to places unknown then laughing together
At the wonders we found
Had it been you?
Eating popcorn and M&M’s in a dark theater
Then working out the next day
Watching her surprise as she opened a tiny box
To see a shining diamond atop a band of gold
Had it been you?
Being deeply engrossed in conversation
While trying to keep
Spaghetti sauce off our chin
Staring at stars across the sky
Like so many angel eyes
Trying to remember our first date
Sleeping late
On Saturday, then making love when we awoke
Had it been you?
Being amazed when we saw a shooting star
Finding sand dollars on the shore
Then watching her make them into necklaces
The smell of cookies baking
Gazing in anticipation at the silhouette
Behind he glass shower door
Had it been you?
Watching a storm flash across the sky
And feeling safe together
Rubbing her back with oil
Carving pumpkins and dressing up at Halloween
Before we had a family
Then borrowing someone else’s kids
To go trick-or-treating
Had it been you?
Saying “to heck with the health kick”
Then eating a box of Twinkies while watching cartoons
Pondering the meaning of life
Then saying a prayer we got it right
Had it been you?
Counting all the pennies in the jar
Then going out to buy something fun
Going to church on Sunday
Watching as she delicately applied makeup
In the bathroom mirror
Packing a lunch and then eating it under a tree
On a lazy afternoon
And will the small voice keep repeating
Had it been you, had it been you
Had it been you?